As we enter into yet another Full Moon week it is once again time to formulate and implement our game plans for releasing and shedding the things that have been weighing us down. This letting go, while necessary, does not come easy to us because it brings with it the promise of uncertainty, empty space, and vulnerability to the things we fear most such as isolation, abandonment, and rejection by our peers.
But if we remain paralyzed for fear of failure, we will stay stuck with the things that plague us and closed off to the possibilities that life has to offer to those who are brave enough to embrace the unknown. Courage and commitment are rewarded, fear and avoidance are not.
The Two of Swords may find you in a state of paralysis. You know that you are not where you want to be but your unwillingness to be vulnerable—a requirement for change—keeps you stuck. There is a decision to be made, but you can only ride your indecision for so long before it begins to torture you, as described by the Nine of Swords.
Indecision, fantasy and unwillingness to commit are all forms of avoidance, because refusal to make a decision keeps the potential for disappointment, hurt, or discomfort at bay. When it comes to your current situation, you may have all the facts in front of you and yet, there is an inability to accept reality because reality would require you to embrace the unknown.
As you continue to avoid change, any fearful and anxious thoughts become worse, not better. You may spend hours each day considering an exit plan or way out, too tired from the circus of your mind by day’s end to do anything but submit to the same circumstances.
By holding tightly to the agenda of maintaining control over the world around you—even when that means staying in a painful but familiar place—you’re being asked now to examine the limitations that you place upon yourself. What are you sacrificing in order to keep the discomfort of loss and uncertainty at bay?
When you refuse to feel the distress that change often brings, you deprive yourself of a chance at a deeper, broader joy. A joy that perhaps surpasses your wildest fantasies. A joy that brings with it connection, belonging, and freedom from the perpetual urge to avoid and escape.
The only way out of pain is through it, and so it’s said in the Six of Swords, which asks also that we reach for a tool that is available to us at all times: Faith.
There will be grief and sadness for what it is that you must leave behind with this change, and do remember that the Full Moon supports your release to the fullest. Do not be surprised by the pain that comes from letting go, even when the released has been the source of great pain and discomfort. We are too often caught off-guard by the grief that accompanies losing even those things that hurt us, so be mindful of attempts to invalidate or rush your grief on the basis that it is unfounded. In your indecision you have avoided this pain for many days and nights, now is the time to face it.
But the grief will not stay, and you must have faith that this is so. In order to move forward, you must leave something behind. This thing you cannot take with you, for it takes up space that your new life will need to take root in. The space it has been pulled from will be raw for a while, but faith and trust will ensure proper healing and new growth.
You are being steered and guided by a force that you cannot see, but just because you cannot see it does not mean that it is not there. If you don’t already, now is a time to establish or rekindle a practice of connecting with a higher force or power. Offer gratitude and thanks for what blessings you can identify. Ask for guidance and protection as you move to higher ground.